Apostle John’s Three Letters . . . 1 John 4:16b–21
Love, Confidence, and the Command to Love
It’s easy to say, “I love God.” It’s much harder to love the brother or sister who’s hurt us, disappointed us, or simply gets on our nerves. In 1 John 4:16b–21, John brings those two claims together: Whoever lives in God’s love will have confidence before him, will love because he first loved us, and can’t genuinely love God while hating a fellow believer. So we have to ask: Is our love for God showing up in the way we treat the people we see?
Today’s passage teaches that genuine love originates in God, who himself is love. Our capacity to love others flows from our relationship with him. As God’s love reaches maturity in us, it gives us confidence for the day of judgment and drives out the fear that comes with the expectation of punishment. John then makes the matter unmistakably practical: Anyone who claims to love God while hating a brother or sister is self-deceived. The command we’ve received is clear — “Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister” (v. 21).
Satan seeks to undermine believers’ assurance, and John’s readers faced teachers whose claims had unsettled some in the house churches. John writes so that they’ll know they belong to the truth and remain in fellowship with God. His answer isn’t merely to repeat a profession of faith; it’s to point to the Spirit-produced pattern of relying on God’s love and loving one another.
John’s two-part statement in v. 12 — God abides in us, and his love is made complete in us — provides a natural transition into this passage. Having explained our abiding relationship with God in vv. 13–16, John now shows how God’s love reaches maturity in us and produces confidence, love, and obedience (vv. 17–21).
Summing up the essence of today’s verses it’s clear that God’s very nature is love (not merely that he sometimes acts lovingly), believers abide in him as they remain in his love, and his love becomes visible in the way they love one another.
Our God Is a God of Love (1 John 4:16b)
What does it mean to live in a close relationship with God? John’s answer brings us back to God’s own character: “God is love.” This isn’t merely a comforting description; it has implications for everyone who claims to know him. If we live in fellowship with the God who is love, his love will increasingly shape our relationships with one another. John joins these truths in the second half of v. 16:
God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them (1 John 4:16b).
Verse 16b contains one of the New Testament’s clearest statements about God’s character: “God is love.” This doesn’t mean that God sometimes acts lovingly or that love is merely one attribute among many. It means that love belongs to who God is. His actions reveal his loving nature, and his love provides the standard by which we learn what genuine love is.
John’s statement also describes the believer’s relationship with God. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God lives in them. To live in love means to remain in God’s love and to let that love shape the way we treat others. Abiding in love isn’t a brief emotional experience; it’s an ongoing relationship marked by dependence on God and love for his people. God’s nature isn’t “loving at times.” God is loving!
This truth gives believers deep assurance. We can know and rely on the love God has for us because his love isn’t uncertain or conditional in the way human love often is. Even when we can’t understand what God is doing, we can hold firmly to his love. Paul expresses this confidence in Romans 8:38–39: Nothing in all creation can separate us from the love of God that’s in Christ Jesus our Lord.
But John’s teaching isn’t merely comfort for private reflection. God’s love is meant to become visible in the way believers treat one another and come to know and rely on the love God has for them. If God’s love lives in us, it will shape our patience, forgiveness, generosity, and care. Genuine faith shows itself in a life increasingly marked by love.
When John says, “God is love,” he isn’t saying that love is simply a gift God gives or one quality he possesses. He’s identifying love as essential to the triune God’s nature. We can know that we truly believe in Christ because the Holy Spirit of love, who enables us to believe, lives in us. And, because God is love, those who know him and remain in fellowship with him will increasingly reflect his love in their relationships with others. The Greek verb phrase translated “lives in” is menō en, meaning to abide, remain, continue, or dwell. John uses it to describe a close and continuing relationship between believers and God. To abide in love is to maintain fellowship with God and to let his love remain at work in us.
Prominent Scottish New Testament scholar and evangelical theologian, I. Howard Marshall, says this about “Whoever lives in love lives in God.”
The Greek phrase translated “lives in” is menō en, meaning to abide, remain, continue, or dwell. John uses it to describe a close, continuing relationship between the believer and God. To abide in love, then, is to remain in fellowship with God and to let his love continue shaping the way we live and love others.
Confidence on Judgment Day (vv. 17–18)
The thought of standing before God on judgment day can be unsettling. We know our failures, remember opportunities we’ve neglected, and recognize how imperfectly we’ve loved. Yet John doesn’t want believers to approach that day with dread. He points us to God’s love reaching its intended goal in our lives — a love that produces a likeness to Jesus and gives us confidence before Father God. Notice how he connects maturing love with freedom from the fear of punishment:
17This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. 18There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love (1 John 4:17–18).
John now explains one purpose of God’s love reaching maturity among believers: confidence on the day of judgment. This isn’t self-confidence or confidence in our record of good deeds. It’s confidence before God, grounded in his love and in the likeness to Jesus that his love produces in us.
The Greek word translated “confidence” is parresia. It can mean boldness, openness, or freedom of speech. John has already used related language to describe the believer’s confidence before God (2:28, 3:21–22). Here, he applies it to the day of judgment: Those in whom God’s love has reached maturity need not approach that day with dread.
Verse 17 adds, “In this world we are like Jesus.” John doesn’t mean that believers become sinless or identical to Jesus in every respect. Rather, as God’s love takes shape in us, we increasingly reflect Jesus’ character in this world — especially in self-giving love for others. That likeness provides evidence that we belong to him.
Charles Spurgeon (English Baptist preacher, 1834–1892) captures the connection well:
“If we can be to the world, in our poor feeble measure, what God is to it — fountains of love, dispensaries of goodness — then we need not be afraid of the verdict, even of the great day of judgment.”
Verse 18 explains the negative side of the same truth: “There is no fear in love.” The fear John has in view is fear connected with punishment — dread of God’s condemning judgment. Mature love drives out that fear because it rests in the God who first loved us and gave his Son for our sins.
John isn’t saying that mature believers never feel anxiety, conviction, or reverent awe before God. He’s saying that love which has reached its intended goal removes the terror of facing God as an condemned enemy. The believer’s confidence rests in Christ’s saving work, not in a flawless record of love.
This assurance also frees us from a “performance treadmill.” We don’t earn God’s love by loving perfectly; we love because he first loved us. When we fail, we confess our sin and rely again on his grace. His love is the foundation of our relationship with him, and that foundation enables us to keep loving without being paralyzed by fear.
When Claims Lead to Commands (vv. 19–21)
John now brings this assurance into our everyday relationships. The God whose love gives us confidence is also the God who commands us to love one another. Believers are to follow God’s commands throughout Scripture about loving others. We can’t separate our devotion to him from our treatment of a brother or sister, especially when loving that person is difficult. Before challenging our claims, however, John reminds us where our love begins: not with our determination to become more loving, but with God’s love for us. Listen to how that gracious beginning leads to an unmistakable command:
19We love because he first loved us. 20Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. 21And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister (1 John 4:19–21).
John’s short opening statement identifies the source of our love: “We love because he first loved us.” In this single, profound statement, John explicitly identifies God as the source, initiator, and foundation of human love in three key ways: (1) God is the primary source of all love; his love preceded ours chronologically and is foundational to all else; (2) God is the cause and motivation to love God and others; we don’t love in order to earn God’s favor or prompt him to love us; rather, his grace serves as the fuel and catalyst that enables and inspires our love; and (3) love is part of God’s essential nature; because love is God’s core character, he’s its ultimate generator. Humans don’t possess an inherent, self-sustaining reservoir of unconditional love (agape); we only reflect and pass along the love that originates from God himself.
Our love isn’t what persuaded God to love us; it’s our response to his initiative. Nor is John speaking only of our love for Jesus. The verses that follow connect God’s love for us with both our love for him and our love for one another.
Reflecting on God’s love can deepen our response to him. Charles Spurgeon encourages believers to consider what Christ has done:
“Jesus loves me; Jesus chose me; Jesus redeemed me; Jesus called me; Jesus has pardoned me; Jesus has taken me into union with himself.” — Charles Spurgeon, “The Secret of Love to God,” sermon no. 2730, preached August 15, 1880.
But John won’t let us separate devotion to God from our treatment of his people. Verse 20 provides a searching reality check: A claim to love God is contradicted by hatred toward a brother or sister. Love isn’t merely an inward feeling directed toward the unseen God. It must become visible in our relationships with the people before us.
John’s reasoning is direct. If we refuse to love a fellow believer whom we can see, we can’t claim to love God whom we haven’t seen. Our relationships provide concrete opportunities to express the love we profess. Patience, forgiveness, generosity, and practical care give substance to our words.
This warning shouldn’t lead us to confuse every painful emotion or struggle with a settled refusal to love. We may need to confront wrongdoing, work through hurt, or establish appropriate boundaries. The question is whether we’re willing to let God’s love govern our response, or whether we’re defending resentment and withholding the care that love requires.
For sinners, it would be impossible to know and love Father God. Fortunately, he chose to show us (his confessing sinners) his love by sending us his one true Son, Jesus. Having done so, our Lord Jesus revealed the Father’s love of us by choosing to die on a cruel cross on our behalf. The cross gives us a decisive demonstration of God’s love. Seeing and appreciating God’s great sacrificial love, we’re bound and obliged to love him back. We also ought to remember what John reminded us in 3:16–17 and 4:11: We’re to not only love God but love our believing brothers and sisters.
Verse 21 leaves no room for treating love as optional: “Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” Loving fellow believers isn’t an additional achievement for unusually mature Christians. It belongs to the command God has given everyone who professes to love him.
In conclusion, God’s love comes first. He revealed it by sending his Son for our sins, and he calls us to reflect it in our relationships. We don’t love others to earn his love; we love because he first loved us. The question isn’t only whether we say, “I love God,” but whether that confession becomes visible in the way we love one another.
† Summary and Key Points of 1 John 4:16b–21
In 1 John 4:16b–21, John connects God’s loving nature with the lives of those who abide in him. As his love reaches maturity among believers, it gives them confidence for the day of judgment and drives out the fear of punishment. Our love begins with God’s initiative: “We love because he first loved us.” That love must become visible in our relationships, because we can’t genuinely love the unseen God while hating a brother or sister we can see.
• God is the source and standard of love (v. 16b). Love belongs to God’s nature, and those who live in love live in fellowship with him.
• Mature love produces confidence before God (v. 17). As God’s love reaches its intended expression among believers, their likeness to Jesus provides assurance for the day of judgment.
• Perfect love drives out the fear of punishment (v. 18). John’s focus isn’t freedom from every anxious feeling, but freedom from the dread of God’s condemning judgment.
• God’s love comes first (v. 19). Our love responds to his initiative; we don’t love in order to persuade him to love us.
• Love for God must become visible in love for fellow believers (vv. 20–21). A claim to love God is contradicted by hatred toward a brother or sister. Loving one another is God’s command, not an optional expression of faith.
- Q. 1 How does God’s love reaching maturity in a believer’s life provide confidence for the day of judgment (v. 17)?
- Q. 2 What fear does John mean when he says that “perfect love drives out fear,” and how can this truth help you when you’re afraid of facing God”s judgment (v. 18)?
- Q. 3 Since “we love because he first loved us,” how can you put your love for God into action toward a brother or sister you find difficult to love (vv. 19–21)?
1 John 4:16–21 (NIV)
Read the passage in another Bible version or listen to First John, chapter 4, read by Max McLean.
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